Happy Birthday to Me

Every year, if we are lucky (though that is possibly an entire conversation for another time), we all get to have this one day that completes the trip and makes us the age we have become. I am 68 now. I have gone around the sun 68 times and am beginning my 69th trip.

It was a nice day. I was sick, but as Abraham says, and as I seem to love quoting these days: "Take the drugs. Dull the pain. But do the emotional work."

I took the drugs, but did not do the emotional work. It's still there for me and will be until I've done it. They are of the minds (Abraham is plural), that any illness or problem is hanging out on the bottom, or toward the bottom of the emotional Guidance scale. At the bottom is Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/ Powerlessness and at the top Joy/Knowledge/Empowerment/Freedom/Love/Appreciation. So doing the emotional work is pretty much just working ones way from wherever one is on the scale to the top.

I actually did an entire NANO novel with short stories using situations where a person starts at the bottom and works their way to the top. It was really fun, though I it's been a number of years ago and I'm not sure I could share it because one of the stories, was, I believe, kind of pornographic.

I have been wondering lately how I am actually manifesting my illnesses since I know that they are showing up because it's easier to get out of doing things I don't want to do by saying "I'm sick and don't want to get you sick," than saying I don't want to do this thing I said I would do. And I don't want to tell an outright lie - 'I'm sick.' when I am really not - so I need to work my body into it. That really makes me pretty powerful because if I can do that, I should be able to do the opposite, meaning I should be able to disappear the ringing in my ears, or the blood sugar issues I have, or the inability to get through piles of clutter in a reasonable amount of time. 

In some ways, that is the whole point of this blog. Getting sick when I need an excuse is a miracle - a backwards miracle maybe but a miracle nevertheless. So now, it's time to find a way away from the cough and sore throat and aches to peace and clarity, health and wholeness. I think that is what "68" is going to be about. When they do not occur, something has gone wrong must become When they DO occur, something has gone right! Time to make things go right.